After doing my whole Losing It Series, I thought I should do something that made us all feel good about how we look no matter what size or age we are. After all, towards the end of my first pregnancy, I hit a weight that technically put me in the same fighting class as Mike Tyson – I felt big, slow and uncomfortable and didn't always feel good about how I looked.
I could have really used a little pick me up from some folks that know how to say, "suck-it-in-a-bucket, I rock!" and nobody does that better than the People of Walmart – yet another site that I could spend three days perusing, and did while swiping these photos (with their generous permission).
So get large and in charge and enjoy your crazy bodies, peeps. Hopefully these shots will inspire you to dawn your very own tutu and shake the good china like it's 1999.
Unfased by the failed foot chase, "Dog the Downy Hunter" decided to search for the perp on scooter.
By going backless, she cleverly avoided those unsightly bra lines.
Somewhere a short, skinny 9-year old is late for school because she can't find her clothes.
At first I was all over the fresh moon tattoo, then I noticed the knee brace, then the bandaged hand. There's a good story (and a reality tv series) in this shot – I just know it.
"I'm overheated. Nothing fits. I need yogurt. Screw it. I'm going to Walmart like this." To this woman I give a standing, slow clap.
With great powers comes great responsibility. Great responsibility indeed.
Coordination is the key to any tasteful outfit – as is visible underpants under banana yellow tights.
Elective surgery doesn't take away from the fact that you need cereal and ball point pens, dammit.
This outfit will be replacing my recurring naked-in-public nightmare.
I've had these days so I can almost support going out in public in something a 6-month old infant would wear. Perhaps with a diaper.
No one could pinpoint the hissing sound until this woman's bum had completely inhaled her pants.
"Sweet, plaid dress with a kitten heel" seems like it should look different. Maybe not.
Just try to tell me you wouldn't want to split a bottle of vermouth with this woman. Just try.
Check out the guy with the butt crack showing. Wait, what guy? I don't see any guy!
Is this considered "tennis whites" or just "forgotten pants"?
You can't deny that a fox tail jazzes up just about any outfit.
I love your sweater. Oh, wait, nevermind.
I bet her toots smell like Skittles.
Cookie Monster vs. Cheerleader. 'C' is for classy that's good enough for me!
I'm depressed that this middle-aged man has nicer legs than I do.
Are you going to tell this woman her top is too small? No, me neither.
Even in a scooter this man commands respect in the tampon isle. I'm especially fond of the elbow pads – safety first, people.
Hopefully her lower back tattoo isn't the ancient symbol for "no".
This man should be wheeled out every time a pregnant woman says she can't wear a bikini.
Look who got around the "no shirt, no service" rule. Clever stud!
Oh, hell to the yeah, so the bitches know where you work. That's right, son.
This woman is clearly comfortable AND modest. Again, someone I would probably enjoy drinking with.
So that's it. Hopefully this kind of candy will make up for my lack of posting lately. Now go look in the mirror and say, "I too could rock a mesh shirt and no bra." Hell yeah.